Showing posts with label Devastation Drive-In. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Devastation Drive-In. Show all posts

Tuesday, June 2, 2015

"L" is for "Laseraptor"

Laseraptor

No. Enc.:  2d6 (See Below)
Alignment:  Neutral
Movement:  180' (60')
Armor Class:  5
Hit Dice:  4
Attacks:  3 (2 claws, 1 bite)
Damage:  1d6 / 1d6 / 1d8
Save:  L2
Morale:  10
Hoard Class:  None
XP:  245

Laseraptors are brownish-green, man-sized reptiles that fire crimson bolts from their eyes. Though rendered extinct "thousands of years ago", they appear in the Mutant Future via time-portals and / or escapes from dino-centric theme parks.

Laseraptors hunt in packs, but always send a lone member to scout ahead.  Many an adventurer has slain the solo creature and gone about her business, not realizing that an angry pack of light-blasting lizards is closing in!

Mutations:  Energy Ray (Laser / Light)






Laseraptors appear courtesy of the new hotness, Kung Fury.  Watch it!


Saturday, November 1, 2014

Please Accept These Passes For A Free Future Admission



Cherished Patrons:

We here at The Devastation Drive-In would like to apologize to you for the numerous projection difficulties this Halloween season. And given how this was to be the very last of our celebrated sojourns into the sordid cesspools of sinister celluloid—it was billed as The Final Cut, after all—we are particularly pained by the anticlimactic experience.

So many pictures went un-screened, like the promised Dr. Black, Mr. Hyde and Killer Klowns From Outer Space. And many other secret features fell by the wayside.

While we ultimately accept full responsibility for the operations at our theatre, in our defense, there were exigent circumstances. How could we predict some selfish louts would birth a baby right in the middle of the parking lot?  Had they no decency, no modesty, no simple consideration for their fellow film enthusiasts?

To rectify this shamefully disappointing and disappointingly shameful situation, we promise to present the remaining films at a later date before the year's end.  We haven't decided if some will randomly trickle out over the course of the next two months, or if they'll be part of another annual seasonal celebration.  Your input is certainly appreciated.

Again, we offer our most sincere apologies.  Please accept these passes for free future admission (with valid purchase, of course) and a complimentary snack at our concession stand.

Your humble servants in cinema,

The Management

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Saturday, April 5, 2014

Megafoot Needs You!


The IndieGogo campaign for The Greatest Movie Of All Time draws to a close on April 6th.

Give them your lucre, people, so I can eventually stat this beastie for the Devastation Drive-In series!

Tuesday, October 1, 2013

YOU WERE WARNED.


In 2011, the living nightmare that was Devastation Drive-In brutalized your body and mangled your mind.

In 2012, its unholy progeny laid waste to your very soul.



And now...

              ...in 2013...

                      THE NIGHTMARE LIVES AGAIN!!!




TREMBLE IN FEAR!!!
COWER IN TERROR!!!
QUAKE IN FRIGHT!!!

MAKE PEACE WITH YOUR GODS!!!

FOR YOU FACE THE UNRELENTING ONSLAUGHT OF...



YOU.  WERE.  WARNED.

AND NOW IT'S TOO LATE!!!

Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Mutants In The News — "Digging Through Ditches, Burning Through Witches" Edition

Anyone who visits this blog during any given October knows that I'm a huge, Huge, HUGE fan of psychotronic, sleaze-o-rama, drive-in fare.

Monsters & mutants & mayhem.
Bikers & babes & bloodshed.
Celluloid & screams & stickiness.
Gimmicks & gratuitousness and gore.

I've tried to do my little part to celebrate the genre, but I'm a mere Ed Wood when compared to the bastard 3-way-love-child of William Castle, Roger Corman, and Herschell Gordon Lewis that is Jack Shear, over at the must-read Tales Of The Grotesque And Dungeonesque.

This man is my hero, because he's made MY ULTIMATE DREAM POST-APOCALYPTIC RPG that I didn't even know I wanted until he first brain-dropped about it!!!

AND IT'S FINALLY HERE.







It has everything that I love in a setting (hell, everything I love in LIFE):  post-apocalyptic trash-fantasies and horror-honeys and hot rod hearses and psychobilly insanity and more monsters than you can shake an electric pitchfork-guitar at.

= Justin's Brain.  SCIENCE!!!


I totally bought it.  You should, too.  (And there's even Lulu coupons, so I hear.)

Seriously, Shear's got THE GOODS.  He's in my Top 3 favorite bloggers, amongst those titans Our Friendly Neighborhood Sniderman and The Abominable Dr. Causey.  Show him some love.

Friday, November 2, 2012

UGH. These Floorboards Are Disgustingly Sticky.



I can't believe I dropped that stupid sno-cone.  And I'll die happy if I never see another box of Red Hots.  Whoah—whose brassiere is this, anyway...?


32 days.
32 movies.
42 unique beasties.
12 new followers...breaking 100!
6 artifacts.
3 campaign settings.
2 diseases.
2 environmental hazards.
1 random chart.
And more consistent—and enthusiastic—comments than I've ever received.

It's been one helluva month.


We here at A Field Guide To Doomsday could not be more pleased with how Spawn Of Devastation Drive-In turned out.  As much as I love trashy movies and goofy monsters for their own merits (or, really, lacks thereof), you faithful readers made the project worthwhile.

Last year's Devastation Drive-In existed to simply tickle my own fancy.  But this year?  This year, it wasn't just for me.  It was about spreading awareness of obscure—if not outright forgotten—flicks.  It was about generating fun content that could see actual use at the gaming table.  It was about doing my best work as appreciation for your support, encouragement, and enthusiasm.

(And, let's be honest...it was also about size-shifting, dual-domed sharks that eat topless eye-candy.

The cinema.  The games.  The people.  The sharks.

My eyes are getting moist over here.

So thank you.  ALL of you.  And some extra big ups to The Cryptkeeper Crew at CountdownToHalloween.com, and Mr. Timothy Brannan at The Other Side for his Monstrous Monday blog-a-thon.

Much love, y'all.


Things around these parts will be back to what passes for normal in the next few days.  I gotta recharge the ol' batteries with an honest-to-gods book...or five.

Sunday, September 30, 2012

IT... IS HERE!!! AND YOUR BRAIN WILL NEVER BE THE SAME!!!


Last October, A Field Guide To Doomsday traumatized you with celluloid scares and filmic frightmares the likes of which your be-bombshelter'd brains had never before beheld!!!

We subjected you to 21 heapin' helpin's of mucky monstrosities and tentacular terrors, of sanguinary squirts and evolutionary aberrations!!!

But this year, beginning October 1st, we go bigger and bolder, with 31 STRAIGHT DAYS of mindbendingly macabre movie mayhem those other Ol' Spineless Recreant bloggers are too timid to tackle!!!

THEY WOULDN'T DARE...BUT WE GO THERE!!!


NO EXPENSE SPARED!!!  A YEAR IN THE MAKING!!!

Featuring ALL-NEW crazed content and classification categories...plus more, More, MORE OF EVERYTHING YOU DEMENTED DEGENERATES COVET AND CRAVE!!!

MORE THRILLS!!

MORE CHILLS!!!

MORE CARNALITY!!!

MORE BRUTALITY!!!

MORE SICKNESSES!!!

MORE SQUICKNESSES!!!

MORE GORE!!!

MORE TO ABHOR!!!

And, most of all...

MORE, MORE, MORE MALEVOLENT MOVIE MUTANTS FROM THE MOST MISERABLE AND MALIGNED MOTION PICTURES OF THE TIME BEFORE!!!

ALL GARISHLY, GIDDILY RENDERED FOR YOUR GAWKING GAZE, SUPPLEMENTED BY A SHAMEFUL SURFEIT OF STUPEFYING STILLS TO SHATTER YOUR SENSES!!!


So grab your dice, your snacks, your flasks, and your date's jiggliest bits, and get ready for the most nail-gnashing, gut-crunching, skull-stomping, psyche-scrambling, libido-loosening, fluid-flurrying, psychotronically phantasmagorical shock-show that is the...

...SPAWN OF DEVASTATION DRIVE-IN!!!



YOUR BRAIN WILL NEVER BE THE SAME!!!

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Mutants In The News — "It Looked Like Kermit The Frog, With Teeth." Edition

So said my childhood chum Scott's mom with mirthful incredulity in 1981, describing the featured creature after an honest-to-Gods drive-in viewing of The Boogens

Which, according DVD Drive-In (one of my absolutely favorite websites for cult movie news and reviews), is arriving on DVD and Blu-Ray this August 8th.


I'm stoked for the opportunity to update my previous write-up of the turtacular tentacled toothy terrors with better screen-caps, instead of using those from an old pan-n-scan VHS tape.

Boogity!!!

Saturday, November 12, 2011

"Ratzen-snitzen-fratzen-ratzen...!!!" — Muttley


I noticed a glaring error in my Devastation Drive-In document:  a blank page where Robot Monster stuff should've been.

GAHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

So, I fixed that, and tweaked a mutation or two to bring them in line with my modified versions (changing Night Vision to Enhanced Vision (Night Vision), for example.)  I also added a few extra stills.

The new version is already uploaded.

Sorry, all.  How humiliating.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Secret Scrawlings and Wasteland Writings (or, PDF = Pretty Danged Fancy)

Credit where credit is due:  Cyborg Trucker clued me into a dandy little widget that lets you download documents directly from your blog.

That lit the fire to get my assorted charts and lists all PDF'd and ready for use, as there have been kind people (like Messrs. Brutorz Bill and Radioactive Ape) who've asked for my material in a less-bloggy format.

So, this is for you, dear readers!

And not only that, but...


...I compiled all of the Devastation Drive-In material into one convenient movie mutant manual.

So take a gander at my behind the scenes screen scribblings over on the Field Guide Documentation sidebar, and tell me what you think.

Next project?  Getting the rest of this blog's muties done up in similar fashion.  Only about 80% more to go!

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Closed For The Season




The Devastation Drive-In is now closed.  Please throw your trash in the appropriate recepticles as you leave the theater.

Whew.  21 movies, and their respective 21 mutants, in a little over 21 days, all for your haunted holiday pleasure.  (Yeah, yeah...I missed getting Robot Monster in there on October 31st by about 45 minutes, but I think it can slide since it's right between Halloween and Mexican Halloween Día de los Muertos.)

Some random musings:

) It was a hoot revisiting old favorites (Blood Freak, SlithisThe Children, Piranha II)...and a joy to finally watch fright-flicks I never got around to renting in the glory days of the mom & pop video stores.   Case in point, The Being.  I clutched its clamshell and poured over its text and images many, many times as a kid, but never actually saw the movie until last week.  And I'm glad I did, because it is utterly insane.  Inept film-craft, slumming celebs (and I'm not even talking about Martin Landau or Ruth Buzzi, but...The Unknown Comic!  And Kinky Friedman!), and a monster whose powers randomly come and go:  all made it a highlight of this month's viewings.

) Because I watched each and every movie (at least) twice to get each entry juuuuuuust right, I didn't have time to get to stat out everything I had in mind.  So, next Halloween, expect theatrical threats and celluloid spooks from the likes of The Green Slime (1968), Night Of The Lepus (1972), Shivers (1975), Attack Of The Killer Tomatoes (1978), Chopping Mall (1986), Demonwarp (1988), The Terror Within (1989)...and more!!!

) Entries of my regular run-of-the-mill mutants will be sporadic over November.  Not only do I really want to curl up with a good book (or five), but I've received several requests over the last few weeks to get my collective blog beasties organized into a convenient PDF.  So I'm gonna be working on that, and get it posted as soon as I can.

) Oh, yeah...my favorite thing?  Introducing readers to genre films they didn't know existed.  There's a ton of great B-features out there, and definite gems amongst the glorious trash.  I've said it before, but I can't say it enough:  Go give Something Weird Video all your filthy lucre.


I really enjoyed this month-long diversion.  As always, thanks for reading, y'all.



Monday, October 31, 2011

Devastation Drive-In — 'Robot Monster' (1953)



Setting Seeds:  Robot Monsterpocalypse

Once The Ancients unlocked the secrets of atomic energy, it was only a matter of time until they discovered the most powerful weapon in the known universe:  the Cosmic Ray!  Intergalactic beings known as the Ro-Mans took notice, however...

...and decided that it was necessary to neutralize the threat posed by homo sapiens...

...BY ANNIHILATING THE ENTIRE HUMAN RACE...AND THEN DESTROYING THE EARTH ITSELF JUST TO BE THOROUGH!!!


An entire Mutant Future setting can be designed around an apocalyptic invasion from space by the Ro-Mans.  The ape-bodied mechanoids hail from the farthest reaches of space, and wield wondrous technologies that seemingly defy all scientific laws and principles:  teleporters, infinite-distance sensors and communicators, planet-eradicating weaponry, and even time machines.

In one potential Mutant Future, the Ro-Mans landed and laid waste to entire cities with their calcinator beams (or C-Rays), which instantaneously caused all of Earth's cities to crumble, and all life forms "above lepidoptera level" within to perish.

The only defense against the effects of the calcinator beam is an innoculation from an extremely rare antibiotic serum that makes the recipients immune to all diseases...and, inadvertantly, to death-rays from space.  So, those given the injections are now the last people on the planet, eking out meager existences in the ruins of civilization...all the while hiding from the Ro-Man hunters sent to exterminate them!











Ro-Man

No. Enc.:  1 (1)
Alignment:  Chaotic
Movement:  60' (20') 
Armor Class:  -2
Hit Dice:  350 hit points
Attacks:  2 or 1 (2 fists, 1 beam)
Damage:  2d10 / 2d10, or special
Save:  L20
Morale:  10
Hoard Class:  XVI, XVII, XIX, XXI, XXII
XP:  20,000

A Ro-Man is a stocky, 7' tall extraterrestrial construct with a gorilla-like body and a helmet-like head.  They have computerized minds and sensors.

Ro-Mans [sic] are powerful physical combatants, pummeling with mighty fists...and if both fists successfully hit in the same round, they can squeeze its target for an additional 2d12 damage.  But their brute strength is almost an afterthought when compared to their godlike powers. 

A Ro-Man can detect and focus on any and all sentient life on a planet, right down to the specific location of any given individual.  It is immune to all attacks and damage from any man-made weapon ("the arms of the entire world tried and failed..."), and all forms of disease, poison, and energy.  And one cannot forget their individual calcinator rays, which burst forth in a 100' radius and kill everything larger than a moth not treated with a special vaccine...with no Saving Throw allowed.  Ro-Mans are immune to the effects of their fellows' C-Rays.

There are only 3 ways to defeat a Ro-Man:  bypass its logic core with philosophical musings and emotional quandaries (in other words, teach it how to be "a hu-man"), entice it with a female Pure Human with a CHA of 13+, or have it be destroyed at the hands of its commanding officer, a being known as a Great Guidance....

Mutations:  Unique Mutation ("Calcinator Beam"), Unique Sense ("Life-Sense")










Ro-Man — Great Guidance

No. Enc.:  1 (1)
Alignment:  Chaotic
Movement:  60' (20')
Armor Class:  -4
Hit Dice:  550 Hit Points
Attacks:  2 or 1 (2 fists, or 1 beam)
Damage:  3d10 / 3d10, or special
Save:  L20
Morale:  11
Hoard Class:  XVI, XVII, XIX, XXI, XXII
XP:  40,000

A Great Guidance is the intergalactic commander of the Ro-Mans.  It possesses all of a typical Ro-Man's abilities and defenses, plus three unique powers.

First, a Great Guidance's C-Ray not only has twice the radius, but it is powerful enough to instantly slay a Ro-Man.

Second, a Great Guidance can unleash Cosmic Tube Rays, which open vortices into the prehistoric past and draws forth 2d10 dinosaurs into the present.  These reptiles berserkly devour every living thing—animal and vegetable—they encounter.

And, lastly, a Great Guidance can bombard a planet with "cyclotronic vibrations" strong enough to "knock [it] out of the universe."  These beams can shatter an Earth-sized planet to dust in only 3d4 rounds.

All of the above powers have no maximum range, and can be broadcast across space, and through communications media (vid-screens, etc.).

Unfortunately, the computers governing the Great Guidances are the most advanced in the cosmos, so appeals to emotion, reason, or philosophy go ignored.  Great Guidances are beings of pure intellect and drive, and never fall prey to human manipulations.

Mutations:  Unique Mutation ("Calcinator Beam"), Unique Mutation ("Cyclotronic Vibrations"), Unique Mutation ("Cosmic Tube Rays"), Unique Sense ("Life-Sense")















Sunday, October 30, 2011

Devastation Drive-In — 'Slithis' (1978)



Environmental Hazard:  Slithis

As the nuclear plants of The Ancients fell to disuse and disrepair, they began to leak radioactivity into the sky, the soil, and the water...

...and not only did the water absorb the powerful atomic energies...

...IT BEGAN TO ABSORB EVERY LIVING THING—ANIMAL, VEGETABLE, AND MINERAL—WITH WHICH IT CAME INTO CONTACT!!!

Slithis is a protoplasmic "organic mud" found downstream from Ancient nuclear power plants.  It is both organic and inorganic, and emits slight Class 1 radioactivity.  (Prolonged, long-term exposure, however, causes tumors, deformations, and even death.)


Pools of slithis are passive hazards much like tarpits...but those that fall into their depths not only drown, but are also absorbed and assimilated upon death.  Bacteria, algae, animals, humanoids:  all are incorporated into the slithis...and the slithis then takes on its victims' characteristics!

When a slithis pool has absorbed 25 HD of living things, the goo coalesces into a monstrous, ambulatory, carnivorous...thing.  All manner of mutants can arise from slithis [meaning the Mutant Lord can use it as a default, all-purpose monster maker], but the most typical result is an amphibious humanoid with an overpowering hunger for flesh and blood....


Spawn Of The Slithis

No. Enc.:  1 (1)
Alignment:  Neutral
Movement:  75' (25')
  —Swim:  45' (15')
Armor Class:  3
Hit Dice:  10
Attacks:  2 + special (2 claws)
Damage:  2d6 / 2d6, + special
Save:  L7
Morale:  12
Hoard Class:  None
XP:  3,800

Spawns of the slithis are doughy, lumbering beasts that stalk waterways, sewers, and Ancient ports.  They arise from pools of slithis, but migrate away in search of live prey. 

Spawns of the slithis devour anything they catch, but relish mammalian viscera most of all.  If a spawn of the slithis successfully strikes with both claws in the same round, it savages its victim's abdomen for 2d8+4 damage.  Once tearing into the innards, the creature fixates on feasting (doing only automatic 2d8+4 biting damage each round), and ignores all other incoming attacks.  Only when the prey item is dead will the spawn of the slithis move on to other foes.

The creatures regenerate rapidly when submerged; in fact, the worst way to dispose of a vanquished spawn of the slithis is to dump it back into the waters from whence it came...!

Mutations:  Aberrant Form (Gills and Lungs), Pain Insensitivity [D], Regenerative Capability (Modified)